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Barbara Ann Graves
Barbara Ann Graves
Sept. 10, 1941 - June 13, 2017
NORTHERN CALIFORNIA – Barbara Ann Graves was born Barbara Ann Scott on Sept. 10, 1941, in San Francisco to parents Harold Scott and Dorothy Mae LeBounger (m).
She grew up in Oakland, Calif., with her sister Joan Mae Scott and brother Harold Scott Jr. Unfortunately Barbara would lose her beloved Mother when she was only 9 years old. At a young age Barbara took the place of her Mother as the “Lady of the House,” and was instrumental in helping to raise her two younger siblings.
When Barbara, was 20 years old her Father brought home his younger friend from work, Robert Joseph Graves (b. 1925 d. 1983), originally from Poteau, Okla. He proposed to Barbara, during a trip together in Clearlake, Calif., when it was still called “Clearlake Highlands.”
They were married on Sept. 30, 1961, in Carson City, Nev. She would give birth to three children: Robert Joseph Graves Jr., Sept. 16, 1963, in Oakland, Michael Scott Graves, July 18, 1965, in Oakland, and Patrick Neil Graves, Oct. 22, in Fayetteville, Ark. (d. Jan. 13, 2013).
In 1969 the couple made the decision to raise their young family in Clearlake. She would live in Clearlake, until the death of her husband on Dec. 14, 1983. In January 1984, she started over in Oakland, with her youngest son Patrick.
She began working in “Law Offices” and soon began to run the operations. In the late 1990s she, along with her “brother-in-law” James Owen Rush, opened their own office in Oakland on Edgewater Drive.
Along with her sister Joan Rush she worked it as a family business until the evening of June 18, 1998. On that night Barbara suffered a severe stroke while locked in a bathroom of the office building. It took over an hour for her to be found and the damage was done.
Not expected to live the weekend, she would prove the doctors wrong and survive. However she lost the use of the right side of her body, lost the ability to speak, had to learn how to walk and eat, and only had a vocabulary of about four words. She was always alert, understood everything that was being told to her, and continued to make her own decisions.
Over the next 19 years she was selflessly cared for by her sister Joan and brother-in-law James Rush.
In time she was preceded in death by her brother, Harold Jr. (Sonny); brother-in-law, James Owen Rush; son, Patrick; and sister, Joan.
In her last years she was cared for by her nephew, Daniel Rush, and his wife Pam, of Oakland, and by her son, Michael.
In that last three years she became a resident of Elmwood Rehabilitation and Care Facility in Berkeley. This was the place she considered home. They treated her wonderfully, and she often blew kisses to the faculty and fellow residents. She loved the people of Elmwood, and they gave her the same in return.
In early March 2017 she was diagnosed with Melanoma. It was discovered too late, and had spread.
Barbara Graves had a zest for life, and a strong will to live, but was given a prognosis of just a few months to live. She choose to spend the remainder of her days at Elmwood.
On June 13 at 4:31 a.m., with her son Michael at her side, Barbara left this world for the peace of another.
She is survived by her oldest son, Robert Graves, and daughter-in-law, Dawn, of Middletown, Calif.; son, Michael, of Clearlake; grandchildren, Jason and Jordan Graves, Sammi Butler and Taylor Graves, all of Virginia; along with several great-grandchildren.
On the final wishes of Barbara Graves their will be no services. Please remember her as you knew and loved her.
